I have been dreaming about water lately and I took that to signify from my subconscious that perhaps I was ready to deal with the time that I nearly drowned as a kid. And today in therapy, we did just that, and it was one of the most intense experiences of my life. Literally coughing, feeling the water getting pushed out of my lungs, my heart pumping faster and faster to keep up. I was only three and a tiny little mite and did not deserve that experience, and yet when my therapist asked the three year old me whether she decided that she should die, I said no, and when asked why not, I replied that I was stubborn.

One of the most powerful things in hypnosis is the fact that you can talk to parts of yourself, reminding them that they are special and loved.


Not just my mother

One of the harder things to that I am coming to terms with is that it was not just my mother who abused me…there were others around me who chose to turn a blind eye to what she was doing.

My father may not have approved or encouraged my mother, and he did go out of his way sometimes to let me feel loved, but he certainly never did anything to stop the abuse.

Perhaps, there are none so blind as those who will not see.