Death does not erase flaws, nor does it release baggage

My mom and I had a difficult relationship. We also had a unique relationship.

I know that for the rest of my life I will still carry some echoes of her in me. There are lessons that she has taught me.

There are lessons that I will learn through our relationship…and my memories of it…as I continue to grow.  I believe that her spirit is still present in my life…and if anything, our relationship will become easier.

I know that I am still carrying the baggage that I accumulated in our relationship. Understanding that sometimes my mom did not mean what she said.

I know I need to learn that I am inherently loveable and was actually wanted. Because I know that my mom did not mean it when she said those things to me.

I do know that my mom loved me…even if she battled to express it. And even if that love was not perfect, because, let’s be honest here: nothing is.

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